Papa, sabar yah.
Beberapa tahun lagi, semoga papa sudah bisa tinggal tetap di rumah, nggak perlu tinggal jauh dan sendirian lagi untuk dinas kerja. Nggak perlu lagi cari makan sendirian kaya anak Kos karena mama udah nyiapin semuanya di rumah.
Vanya janji untuk berusaha lebih dari sekedar berusaha. Untuk selalu berbuat baik sama orang. Untuk bekerja dan mendapat penghasilan selayak mungkin. Untuk ngutamain orang-orang yang sayang sama kita daripada orang-orang yang menyianyiakan.
Tapi papa harus punya umur panjang dan sehat, yah. Nanti kalau sudah tinggal tetap dirumah dan nggak kerja lagi, vanya sering2 ajak olahraga di Senayan atau GBK biar badan papa nggak ringkih. Walaupun vanya bakal banyak jajan daripada olahraganya, yang penting papa harus olahraga. Heheheh. Nanti kita sering ngeteh sore-sore yaa, biar papa nggak ngopi terus. Oh ya, nanti vanya umpetin rokok papa diatas genteng biar papa nggak bisa ngerokok lagi, sesering apapun papa beli rokok. Heheheheh.
Papa, maaf ya tulisan ini jadi doa dan harapan yang invisible aja karena nggak disampein langsung. 
Papa sehat-sehat terus yaaah sampe pensiun!

I feel. I sense. How someone sees me in person through their inner mind, deeper thoughts, unconscious and slipped statement from their bare mouth even when it comes out as jokes. Though I can’t verify the authenticity of them, I can’t not holding onto these ideas.

How it’s like to be, when someone always sees you as an alternative, back-up, last person they would want to end up to live with?
That their superior, arrogant, yet a total human-ish idea of having a physically perfect and talented partner will always be their wish, so no matter how much you do in loving them, will never be enough.
That they want to stay with you today because they think they are not decent enough yet to get the perfect one, so in the meantime, staying with you is the last option they could have, while keep waiting to get a chance of accomplish their ego.

I am like a bomb with a time.